Sunflowers

 I used to like sunflowers;

They reminded me of warm, happy, sunshiny days.

I used to like sunflowers;

Their tall stalks and large faces lined along the fence.

I used to like sunflowers;

Wanted them in every color and size, leaving me amazed.

I used to like sunflowers;

Their seeds in the ground or in my trail mix or salad.

I used to like sunflowers;

They used to be a sweet thing to me, in my yard or as a treat.

I used to like sunflowers, and nothing against them now, but

I can’t bring myself to even look or be around

Sunflowers that make my baby sick;

I can’t bring myself to adore the sunflowers like before,

When their very presence reminds me of difficult days

When no matter how hard I tried, I was never enough.

Because Sunflowers caused all that went wrong.

I don’t hate Sunflowers, but I don’t like them now.

And if I were to ever see one or pick a Sunflower or seed,

I would only feel grief, and guilty.